Stages of Every Fan Girl

            After fifteen years of your human existence, you finally caught yourself in love with someone. That's great news. The bad news though, is that he is a celebrity. Sometimes, you share this kind of infatuation with your friends, sometimes they raise an eyebrow at you and ask "What the heck did you see in this boy?" There is also self-denial: I am not in love, I am just supporting him for being him. Fan girl? What are you talking about? I am a supporter! The difference between fan girl and supporter is that fan girls support a celebrity from their asset; Supporters do the same thing but with all the aspects and roles he has on his life.

            He might think, "awww, what a sweet fan I have" or might appreciate your kind of love for him but whether you like it or not, you have to accept the fact that you'll get rejected by him most of the time. Trust me, his busy schedule is not the only reason why. Even so, here are a few points why you keep yourself locked to that kind of fantasy.

1. The Changes (because You make extra effort for him)

-Makeup, outfit of the days, likes and bombards on social media; you wonder whether he knows you exist or you're a plain bubble appearing/giving joy and then all at once, disappearing. Whether you fit yourself to his radar, you find yourself stumbling to getting his attention. Stranger zone? ALWAYS the first step to any form of relationships. Fan zone? Congratulations, you may hug him and kiss him and take pictures with him to your heart's content...after you get yourself in the front line of his enormous wave of fandom just like you. Acquaintance zone, not friends, not strangers; it's the perfect time to take your best feet forward. Get to hang out with him? Milk tea seems nice, don't you think? Invite him to grab some smoothies (because it's summer) or walk with him at the Manila Bay to catch the sunset. Make sure that you don't get paparazzi's talking candid photographs of you scratching your butt behind him. Friend zone (to best-friend zone) WELL, consider yourself lucky, or luckier than the rest of his circles. Just be yourself and enjoy your time together.

2. The Roller Coaster Ride
-One day you like him. One day you don't. This is the side effect of the thing we called one-way relationship where in one gives and the other neither benefits or gets harmed. It gives you some kind of frustration. Like the typical situation, "He signed my shirt and told me he loved me. Why didn't he get my number? Why hasn't he tweeted me yet?" Then you checked a number of photographs at your phone's gallery of you and him last night. "Was that my face? Did I look this fat? Is my armpits really sweaty last night? Oh no, I might have turned him off. But he was texting someone last night. Maybe it's his girlfriend. No, I AM his girlfriend! Oh Universe, please, please, pllleeeaasssse give me what I want. I promise to make it up to you by donating clothes to charity. Just, GIVE ME THE BOY!"
That kind of frustration can turn harmless to harmful. For most people, it is healthy for them because they have decided to put their crush on the admiration zone--the type of circle where you don't expect anything from a person, but you simply look up to him because he is talented in his field or his craft. But for you, exceeding over that limit, what we call obsession. What? No you're not "cyber sleuthing" now, are you? You end up blaming yourself and becoming insecure of yourself just because. And when the time comes that you are "ending" this relationship, you always end up giving him a chance to that kind of love, thinking that there really is a chance for you two. Don't rely on chances.

3. The Electromagnetic Field of Attraction

 -YES, he liked your photo. YES, he replied on your tweet. YES, he added you as a friend/accepted your friend request. Later, you find yourself banging your head back and fourth like an electrocuted kid near the switch. Your whole body is on vibrate and somehow, you find it easier to believe that love might finally knocking at your door. Whatever happiness you're feeling, we're all happy for you.  Go on, live the moment. Just, don't spill yourself some coffee, or do nothing crazy (even if, well, you seem to be one.) Need I say more?

4. Moment of Truth
-The day has come! The time in your life when you wished the rumor that Brad Pitt got hitched with Angelina Jolie. Although your sources are always correct, sometimes you wish they weren't. And if it was, who would be right? It's official: HE'S IN LOVE, HE'S NOT SINGLE ANYMORE, HE'S GOT A GIRLFRIEND! And you tell yourself, why can't my love story be like Katie Holmes and Tom Cruise (another fan girl story)? Well, here's something to light the beam, the important thing is, you've met a different person and a different version of you after this encounter of your life! Be happy, just like them. And don't make plans A-Z (times infinity) to crash their relationship just as great as he has crashed you. Leave the innocent girlfriend alone! Or, if you are the girlfriend, wow lucky you (I mean it! How did you do it?) All you have to do is be strong (for you and for him and the entire human race). You'll handle a lot of obstacles and criticisms along the way, and this is your head start, look outside, login to your twitter and Facebook account. Or don't. 

5. The Crash
-From crushing to actually crashing, you take the bad hard fall from the flames of "love" its burning sensation. When it's in the line of over and finally over, you don't know how to start your life again. Some people skip this step in their life, like either they stop crushing their celebrity fandom or they simply found a new one and a lot of other possibilities. This is the last step of your non-mutual love. Goodbye, love. Okay, cry a bit, it will help. People cry not because they're weak but because they have been strong enough for so long. You need time and time alone will heal you. By the power vested in me, I proclaim you to go out there and embrace the new possibilities of life and adventure. Besides, it's not your loss but his. How come? Well, he never let himself be loved and be cared for by a cute, loving, supportive and sweet girl like you. Cheer up, darling. Your "true" love is waiting and praying to love you back. In the meantime, don't look at Zac Efron's abs because it reminds you of him(the boy who broke you but will make you stronger, soon!)

Key Notes:
-Every one experiences heartache at some point or another. It might not be in this kind of manner but love is love and it hurts when the fuel dies, it hurts when you don't get what you've had expected. Remember that audition he was "dying" to pass, well he didn't. I'm sure he cried over it, too.
-Give him a chance to be a person. You know, he has rights: the right to choose. Sometimes we have to rebut this with: we have the right to be informed. Yet, whatever the cause is, we have the right to remain silent because we cannot do anything about the plans of Earth and its shifts in time.
-People are people. Accept whatever (stupid) reason he has for not choosing you. What would you feel if you were the one chosen by him and suddenly all the bashers came out from the even?
-You deserve love, but with him, there are limits to that kind of love. Embrace and love yourself first for you are one special person in the world that no one could either duplicate or harm. You are strong! Strong for supporting him, strong from surpassing his wave of fans just to get an autograph, strong enough to prove to him that you are worthy of him, strong enough to face whatever criticisms you can get from your parents, friends, loved ones, co-fan girls from not understanding your special feelings for him. But has he? Has he been strong enough for you? Strong enough to reply on that collage you made for him, strong enough to tell the world that he has the sweetest fan in the world, strong enough to say "thank you and I appreciate your efforts" to you during his rehearsals, strong enough to defend you from people who mess up with you, and most importantly strong enough to trust you in your thoughts and in your words, in your soul and in your body, and in your love for him. NO. I therefore, conclude that he doesn't deserve you.

-There's someone waiting for you out there. Just be open for new possibilities.
-Lastly, know your goals and prioritize them. Life does not stop when he didn't like your Instagram post. But it does when you flunk Chemistry. So go ahead and mind your life first. Be mindful of your physical, emotional, mental, and social aspect of your life. They have to be balanced, well taken care of, and healthy.

Stages of Every Fan Girl Stages of Every Fan Girl Reviewed by Michelle Tan on 1:53 PM Rating: 5


  1. Blog worthy ate Tami. --Gella Salazar

  2. I love how you make readers feel like everything and anything is possible...even though it isn't. :( But really, confidence is key!


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